I have never heard anyone say, “I don’t want my life to get better”. The truth is that at some point in our lives we all want something new or better. That is why every year at this time many of us begin the new year with a new focus; that being to improve our lives in some way. And with the new year, we become bombarded with messages about new year resolutions. We hear things like “ new year new you ” or take this 90-day challenge or this 30-day challenge. Let’s talk about the whole ” new year new you ” thing shall we?
It is no surprise that the average new year’s resolution is to lose weight and get in shape and there’s nothing wrong with this however I believe it is important to think about why we want these things. What is it that we really want? Doesn’t it really come down to wanting to be happy and having peace and enjoying our lives? I think about people focusing on losing weight and improving they’re outer life so they can be happy and have a better self-image; honestly that is like putting a band aid on it broken leg. It does not “heal” or resolve what we really want or need.
If you are looking for a ” new year new you ” that lasts, focus on your inner life.
If what we really want is to be happy and enjoy our journey, we need to focus on our inner life; our heart, our mind, attitudes, will and emotions. Now, don’t let the thought of this or of change overwhelm or discourage you. Changing and growing is nothing new for most of us. We are constantly growing and changing; we develop new skill sets in our jobs and careers, we learn new ways on how to cook a turkey or simplify cleaning our houses with toxic free chemicals. Focusing on our inner life is just improving ourselves on the inside.
Back to happiness; I do understand that experiencing happiness is not always easy. Things can get in the way. What gets in the way of our happiness…challenges… challenges in our circumstances, relationships, finances, careers, etc. It is life’s challenges that can steal our happiness. This is another reason why it’s important to focus on our inner life. Keep in mind…
We can’t be happy on the outside if we are not happy on the inside.
I remember being part of a conversation with a group of ladies at a social event. One lady was discussing the many issues she was constantly experiencing, wondering when her life would become easy. At one point, of course this was before I became a woman empowerment teacher, I said to her, “You do realize that you will always have challenges in your life”. Everyone stopped and looked at me. I can still see her expression. It was a look of shock or maybe it was disappointment that what I said was really true; that she will always have challenges in her life. My intent was not to hurt her in any way but instead to help her see the reality of what life really brings us all. We will all have challenges but how we decide to react and deal with these challenges determines how we will enjoy our journey as well as our level of happiness.
By focusing on our inner life we develop the skills to handle challenges that come our way.
Understanding why we want things helps us to know where we need to focus. We are so often deceived into thinking that specific things or people will bring us happiness. It is important to get to the core of our desires; what is in our heart to be, do and have? It is still good to be aware of our outer life of course, but just know that focusing on that alone will not bring the happiness, peace and the joy we are truly looking for.
So what if for this “ new year new you ” instead of focusing solely on changing your outside world you shift your focus on your inside world? You may be wondering how to go about this. There are numerous resources for you; books, DVDs, CDs, teachers, and speakers on the topic. You can also explore Google.com or search the selection of books in the self-help section of your local library.
These are all wonderful avenues for you. Another option for you is to read my book The 12 Principles… How to Create an Empowered Life. It is a self-help activity guide filled with practical ways (I call them awareness exercises) to grow your inner life. This book will help you find clarity with what you really want, how and where to focus as well as how to love who you are, accept challenging people, simplify and balance your life and so much more.
Good news for you…it won’t cost you anything because it is currently a free download on my website NancyDahlke.com.
Please remember, we can all focus on the outside but what really counts is what’s on the inside because what is inside always works its way out. What am I talking about…if you have anger, anxiety, frustration, fear, worry or disappointment inside of you it will work its way out and into your relationships, your focus, and ultimately your happiness level. Focus on the inside then everything can fall into place on the outside.
Whatever you choose, it is my hope that you do indeed experience great happiness this year and every year that follows. I love to empower women and you can too! If you have found this article helpful, please share it!