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[When People Attack] Dealing With Challenging Behaviors – Why Are Some People So Challenging?

Dealing with challenging behaviors…It can be frustrating when dealing with challenging people and behaviors. Certain individuals can sometimes rub us the wrong way. And unfortunately there may be times when we react negatively instead of taking a moment to recognize our differences. After all, we are all created differently. We think different, act different, and have our own beliefs. We are also equipped with unique gifts and qualities. Here are some insights you may consider the next time you feel like someone is not making your life easy:

  1. First we need to understand that many challenging people are operating out of fear; fear of the unknown, fear of not being accepted or being good enough, and worthy.
  2. Fear brings out a variety of emotions; anger, arrogance, suspicions, jealousy, the need to control, disrespect, dishonesty, aggressiveness.
  3. Sometimes we may be a trigger for this person because something about us reminds them of a past hurt.
  4. When in fear, we tend to react not always realizing that it is our fear causing our emotions and behavior. 
  5. Challenging people may also have a lack of self esteem and confidence.
  6. They may not have a good support group of friends and family and may feel very alone.
  7. Challenging people may not be physically well.
  8. Perhaps you can ask yourself, “How do I behave when I am not feeling well?” 
  9. A challenging person’s beliefs may not be similar to ours, causing us to see things differently.  Beliefs are our perspectives and what we believe to be true based on our past. Usually what we believe is only someone’s opinion that we have accepted as our own. It may not even be true.
  10. Challenging people may be going through personal trials that we are unaware of.

So…the next time you come face to face with a “challenging” person, consider taking a moment to accept where they are, and be less consumed with how their behavior makes you feel.  This will not only allow you to feel better and experience greater peace, it will give you the opportunity to be an example of what kindness and compassion looks like. 🙂

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